Former NFL player Don McPherson spoke to Lehigh students Monday night in Packard Lab about getting engaged in conversations related to sexual and domestic violence. He explained that dialogue is an initial step to solving this issue.
McPherson reiterated his point by discussing the issues and then the actions that happen as a result of these issues. He asked the audience if they had learned about these issues from their families, and if not, where they had learned about them. The most popular answer was from the media, but McPherson noted that these reports can be inaccurate.
When asked how students can initiate conversations about these issues, McPherson answered, “Find other people who are willing to talk and are not afraid.”
Brooke DeSipio, the director of Gender Violence Education and Support, agreed with McPherson that the students need to get more directly involved with these issues.
“These issues are important nationally and on our campus,” DeSipio said. “I hope students continue to be engaged and take Don’s advice.”
The issues of sexual and domestic violence have been viewed as problems for women and as ones in which men don’t need to get involved. McPherson strongly opposed this notion and highlighted that for sexual and domestic violence to end, men have to be a part of the conversation.
“Violence against women is more common, but it’s not the woman’s fault if she’s abused,” said Lauren Fosbenner, ’19, who attended the presentation. “That’s like asking if it’s someone’s fault to get robbed.”
McPherson said people usually don’t talk about touchy issues such as alcohol, drugs, sex and domestic violence. He pushed the notion that we have to purposely speak about the uncomfortable subjects.
DeSipio appreciated McPherson’s personal and realistic approach.
“He got real with the students and was engaging,” DeSipio said.
McPherson discussed the pressure to be strong, emotionless and fearless as a man, and how the distinction between males and females starts at an early age. He said that there a gendered separation is created that teaches males that women are viewed as inferior.
Men have to break the cycle and be willing to think rationally without acting in the heat of the moment, McPherson said. They must make efficient decisions by partaking in conversations about preventing issues like these from occurring.
He engaged the male students in the audience by putting them in hypothetical situations where they could be insulting someone like their mother or someone else’s daughter.
“In the past, the Gender Violence and Support Office helped mostly girls,” DiSipio said. “This presentation addressed both genders and engaged men, as well.”
McPherson stated that despite how it looks or feels, this generation is more aware and open to talk about sexual and domestic issues than previous ones.
McPherson said adults aren’t doing a good job with this new generation, and they’re ultimately letting the culture down by not talking about these issues.
McPherson hopes students will talk to others about these issues and break the silence that has been passed on through previous generations to eliminate sexual and domestic violence entirely.
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