Olivia Menkowitz and Emily Segal provide advice to questions from anonymous sources. This is the first column in the B&W Advice series.
I’m a freshman and (I am) having trouble with time management and saying no to going out when I should stay in and do my work. Please give me advice on how to do both and not get stressed out. -givemeadvice
We totally understand where you’re coming from. Learning how to balance work and fun is one of the toughest challenges when coming to school, especially at Lehigh — a “work hard, play hard” environment. Our advice to you is first, be organized. Think about getting a planner, or even using an online organizer, and blocking out parts of your day to do work. Plan ahead what assignments need to be done and decide when you aim to finish them by. If you don’t reach your goals by the end of the day, don’t beat yourself up about not being able to go out.
In the grand scheme of things, we are here for a college education. Although your social life is important, you must prioritize your academics. Any real friend will support this. If not, then in time they will understand. Everyone’s workload is different, and soon enough, your friends will have nights they can’t go out either. Trust yourself and your ability to make the right decision. You’ve got this.
I’m stressed about classes and need places on campus to unwind. I don’t have a car so I can’t go off campus. Help! -jenna4545
Don’t worry, there are lots of places on campus or a walking distance from campus to relax. First, there is a new meditation room in Taylor Gym. On Fridays, there is even guided meditation from 1:15 p.m.- 1:45 p.m. If you are looking for a place that is less quiet, a new coffee shop called Sagra Beans recently opened near campus on 306 S New St. Stop in to study, grab a quick treat or hang out with friends.
Lastly, a great getaway from the main campus is Lehigh’s very own Mountaintop Campus. Even though you don’t have a car, it’s easily accessible if you catch the Mountaintop Express. You can access the bus schedule through the Lehigh Live app, or on any of the bus station screens at Asa Packer. On Mountaintop, you will find the home of all art, architecture and design classes. These chic and modern spaces have amazing views and make for a great place to get away. There is even a cafe complete with snacks and Starbucks coffee. We hope this helps.
My friend’s boyfriend is abroad and she seems so focused on him and their communication. We’ve been noticing it’s making her even (more sad)… How can we talk to her about it when she acts like everything is fine? -Worried friend
Dear Worried friend,
It’s always hard to see a friend upset. Our advice to you is to stay positive. Obviously, you are a great friend who cares a lot. However, sometimes gestures speak louder than words. If you feel like you would make your friend uncomfortable by directly confronting her, consider writing her a note or leaving her favorite snack to let her know you care. What’s important is that she knows you’re there for her, and if she feels that way, she may come to you on her own.
Be patient. Sometimes it’s hard for people to open up about their problems. In the meantime, try to spend time with her doing things that take her mind off of her situation. Going for a run, seeing a movie or even just ordering in dinner may seem like a small thing, but it could help her feel supported and loved. Your friendship is more powerful than you think.
Edit Desk: The social media generation. I am unable to comment on the article noted at the article itself so I will do it here.
A picture is said to be worth a thousand words but a picture would be unable to say what was said in “The social media generation”. Good work. Good writing is something from the past that has not gotten old, from my point of view, but is something that seems to be not appreciated as much now as in the past.
Your advice to givemeadvice is appropriate for social media where the experience of something can be diminished by the constant interruption of describing an experience as it happens or searching for other experiences. It seems as though everyone wants to be the designated recorder of an event even events of limited or no real relevance. Time seemingly needs to be filled on the fly by any activity rather than by a schedule. Social media is valuable for the “work” of life but can be addicting as “fun”.